Do you believe in God? Like do you believe that one day he'll solve your problems that are out of your hands? Or maybe someday He'll make it easy for you? Or are you atheist?

The way I'm asking these questions to you, you'd be feeling like I'm an atheist. Well, trust me, I'm not. I believe in Him. I believe that my problems will soon go away. But times like these, I feel like a kid who believes in fairy tales that aren't really true. Sucks, right? I'm sure one way or another you've felt this way.

The point is I want to believe in him. But he doesn't want me to. I don't know where I went wrong in my life, like, truly.  I love my family more than anyone or anything else. And let me tell you, every person in my family is just amazing and honest and loyal and caring. I've seen no one like them before. But this is why I feel like why do bad things keep happening to them? Like why? They never did anything wrong. Even they care for people at an annoying level. I sometimes think that it's too much. We have to let people go when they screw us over. But my father always think the best of people. But still everything bad is happening to him. He has done everything for his kids to live their best life. But still we feel like there is something that is making very hard for us to live happily. 

I am a very anxious person and oversensitive too. I always want a nice time for my family. I can just never see anyone in my family upset. And if I do, I get upset. I always be the one who balances things out. My father is a very emotional person and my mother is a very genuine one.

Back to the topic, God. Tell me, do you believe in God? I believe in him. I thank him. I fight with him. I cry because of him. I make wishes too. Everyone does, right? But now, I'm fighting this battle in me. I just don't get why is everything so broken now? Why can't we live happily for few days with no tension? 

I'm just hoping that the moment I publish this blog, everything will go back to normal in my small little life.

See you in my next blog i.e if I get this one published