Nothing knew would it, be if I say we all are bored to death being locked inside our own houses. Me too! I mean, how much of cooking can you do? How much of baking can you do (Not that I do any but let's just say for the sake of melodrama). How much of social media or OTT can you do? Also how much can you sleep especially when you cannot sleep! You need some real action. You need to have fun. And the best way to have fun is by bugging others. You need to pull a fast one on them. It can be your friends or your miyan or your nemesis aka your aulad or your unpleasant neighbour or your ex-boss who has been nasty to you or the restaurant owner who sent you useless food and charged you a bomb but you couldn't do anything about it just because you didn't want to be a bad person. The list is long. It could be anybody. You can actually bug a lot of people. Even strangers. But how do you do that sitting inside your houses?
Hence, I miss our very own "Land Line phones". "Our Telephones" Yes, I badly miss a land line phone that too without a caller ID. Of course caller ids come handy if you wish to avoid calls from your unwanted relatives, irritating tele marketeers, friends who call themselves friends but are they really are, etc etc. But then phones have made life so boring with caller ids. We could do sooo much with a landline phone that too without a caller ID.
We could call people any number of times and not get caught. Ofcourse vice versa was also possible. Could get stalked by a clingy psycho and end up having sleepless nights. Although who will stalk us at 50 but you never know. Stalkers have no age bar I am sure.
We could call our Miyan and make sure he cannot work. Especially, after we have had a fight and he has left for office without resolving it. Especially, because our ego has been big enough to take the first step and say sorry. Especially, when it's his mistake, which always is according to us. Or it's just our way of getting even with him.
We could call our children any number of times, even if they were In the room next to ours, without the fear of being avoided simply because there's no caller ID saying "psycho mother calling." Most importantly, we could tap into their phones by adding a secret parallel line and know everything which we want to know about them! Which we hardly know about them! Which they just don't want us to know about them! Which we have every right to know about them! Do we?
We could call our neighbour, play pranks on them and have some fun. Like my dad used to. He would call, manoeuvre his voice a bit and ask his nasty neighbour, "Chadda Ji. Main LG se bol raha hoon. Aapka fridge chal raha hae kya?" Chadda ji would respond, "hanji bilkul chal raha hae. Kyun?" Dad would then say, "jara dekhiye, chal ke kahan tak pahuncha hae." Chadda ji could never figure out who it was calling him every second day.
We could call our friends, manipulate voices, pull a fast one on them. Like we used to do it in college. It used to be so much fun. We could even call strangers. Remember how we used to pick up our yellow pages and call up random numbers. Change voices. Mimic actors. I remember used to mimic Kesho Mukherjee. It used to be so much of fun. We used to do so much of crazy stuff.
Las tbut not the leastt. Nothing but nothing could have beaten the sadist pleasure of banging a phone on somebody!!
Ah! What an awesome feeling it used to be!!
