Today, for the first time, I prayed for myself,
Whispered wishes not for you, but for my own soul’s health.
Each prayer before, I sent your way,
For your joy to bloom, for your skies to stay.

Because , your smile, it lights my skies,
Your laughter, my sweetest sunrise.
But I paused and asked-what about me?
Who holds my heart when I set yours free?

You shine so bright with friends around,
While I stay quiet, without a sound.
If I keep praying for your delight,
Who will pray for me at night?

Will you remember I’m even here,
Or question me until I reappear?
You are all I have, it’s true—
But you ignore me, like I’m nothing to you.

I called, I reached, I tried to be seen,
But silence wraps what we might have been.
So today I prayed, for the first time
Not for your joy, but finally, for mine.

-Sanjay Anuguthala.      

Hi, guys. This is my first poem here. I wrote many, but, this particular poem, “For once, I prayed for myself” is a reflection of my own experiences as a lover boy. I always found myself putting someone's happiness above mine, and I prayed for their happiness. I thought that their happiness could actually make me happier.But, it took me a while to realise that if i continue to pray for their happiness, who could pray for my happiness? No one. All I wanted is to be included, to be loved by the person I love. But, I was left alone. Writing poems and stories is like a therapy to me which makes me happier. This allows me to process the emotions and maintains the balance. Take it as a advice from me, stop investing yourself in the people who doesn't value your emotions. Know that you deserved the Worldly happiness, you deserve to be treated right. People come into your life, some stays, some leave and some becomes a lesson. Lessons are meant to stop you from making the same mistakes again. I may sound cringe, but, if you are suffering from something which can't be disclosed. Know that you have yourself. Moving on can be really tough but once you do. This world looks different. Even the sky turns pink if you wish to paint it. Take your own time to heal. It's okay to take break until you feel like you again. Okay end of the conversation. 

Thank you and Toodles…