Hi friends, today when I’ve decided to write a blog I was having totally different topic in my mind but something happened today that made me thinking and when I’ve finally switched on my laptop, I want to share something totally different with you. Today I want to tell you my own story. From very childhood I was very silent kind of girl. I can remember myself sitting on a porch with a book on my lap and a pencil in my hand watching my little brother and other children playing. When I recall those moments I don’t think I had any urge of playing with those children, I was quite happy and contended with myself and my book. I grew up to be the same. In my school, college or job days, I have had very few friends; none of them were best ones, like general friends. We never hung out or something after school or college or job. Currently I am not in contact with anyone. It’s like their memory, their faces are blurring now, and in fact I forgot some of their faces. Thanks to Face book, I can see them in their lives happy. But I don’t feel like messaging them. It’s not that I don’t like them or have any problem with them, I love them, I always pray for them and I feel happy when I see them through social media getting through their life but I just don’t want to talk to them, that’s all. In fact I never want to talk to anyone in my life until its necessary. For me this behavior is totally normal. I love my silence. I love my peace of mind. I love thinking twice before uttering a word. I have a lot to tell to everyone but I feel like no one will understand me and ultimately that thought converts itself into a different thought that I don’t want to tell them anything and its OK. 

               But then I got married and everything changed. My in laws are very talkative and over social kind of people. They love mingling with each other and all. So being a new member of such family, they started expecting me to always talk to them and to gossip with neighbors and we get a lots of guests at our house so to be friendly with them and so on. I must say that my in laws are very nice people, they always care for me and they love me but they are not aware of my behavior or liking and I didn’t wanted to disappoint them in any ways so I’ve started changing myself a bit. Now I talk a little bit more than usual. Sometimes passively I become part of some gossip which later I realize that I should have avoided. In all these, I forgot my habit of asking myself twice whether the word that is coming out of mouth is necessary or not, or is it going to hurt the fellow person and then I regret that moment to which I can’t amend. During these moments, I miss the old me, the wise me. 

             Very recently I came to know that I am an introvert, who has changed herself into an extrovert or I can say is failed to be both. So I want to tell you my friends, never try to change yourself in order to please others. You’ll never feel that peace in your heart. 

BE YOURSELF