Hey there!!!

So, guys….. finally I'm going to share a really very personal story. I don't know why but I want to express myself.

I'm a girl of almost 15 living in a small city. I have 3 siblings :- a brother aged 21, two sisters one of 18 and other is approximately 20. I am the youngest and last child. When I was younger, I never felt  discriminated for being a girl. My parents, grandparents and siblings all treated me well. 

My grandmother treated me like her little princess. She said that I look and speak the same way as her daughter (my bua/aunt) used to. I was born few months later after the death of that bua. I loved and still love my family very much.

 My grandmother died in December, she didn't have any illness or stress. She died because of heart attack. Me and my siblings couldn't meet her when she was counting her last moments in hospital, as her death was unexpected my parents didn't call us to hospital.

1 months later, my eldest bua(aunt) came to visit us and take some of the stuff that my grandma left. My brother had already departed from the home to go back to the place where he studies. My sisters don't like to talk with any of the relatives, so they stayed back in their rooms. Even I don't like to talk to anyone but I understood the circumstances and just to make her comfortable I didn't even study properly for the exam I was going to give the next day. I talked a lot to her, let her cry with me openly, served everything I could. She was looking happy and so were me and my mom.

The next day, I was getting ready to go and attend exam in school, a bit afraid but keeping strength. My aunt was sitting in the kitchen helping and talking with my mom. Suddenly, she raised a point. She said," It would have been better if a boy was born instead of Yagya (my name) . You don't have luck Neelam(my mother's name). I was stunned looking in the mirror and tieing my ponytail. My mother said by faking a laugh," You shouldn't say like that didi. If pitaji will hear about this, he is definitely going to scold you. Yagya helps and takes care of pitaji very well. That buaji was like," Ya! Of course Yagya is good but it would have been better if you got a boy. You would have completed a pair of boys in your house. But what to do now."

Buaji left for her home and later I departed for school. The whole way to school, I was cycling and just thinking about what comeback  I should have gave to her. And here is the one I came up with at that moment:- Of course! It would have been better if there was a boy instead of me, at least he would not have to listen to someone like you. But later, I thought that this isn't something I want to say. Actually, I don't want to say anything to her. I just wanna show her that she is a lady and at least three times older than me, and I'm just a kid of 14.

Later, my mom asked for forgiveness from buaji's side. I assured my mom that she doesn't need to, because she hasn't done anything wrong. That day I was worried about the situation of mental state of people living in this world. I felt bad for buaji that she didn't achieve the things she could have just because society filled up her mind with these kind of things. 

You know, having much older siblings gives you a lot of demerits, but also much more merits. They make you think about future, they make you mature, they make you think about your life, they calm you down….even if you don't ask them.

I'm not trying to brag, but I have achieved a lot of things already. These things are protecting me against the people who are carrying a sword for me. I have participated in Nationals in science competition two times, granting me trips to IIT Kanpur and Bhopal. I have participated in Geothe Institute's German camp when I was 11 years old and I went to a trip to Jim Corbett National park in Nainital. I have already participated in so many competitions that I went on total thirteen trips from school, that too free of cost. I have seen a lot of things and I'm happy about each experience. And the most heaviest one is the money prize of INR 10,000 last year, for the selection in a science award.

You may think that I'm writing these achievements to brag and show off, but this isn't true. I'm just reminding myself that I'm not a liability, I'm an asset. I do this everytime I'm having a mental breakdown.

I'm happy to share my story with you.

Comment down if you have any same story or if you have any suggestions. I wait for your comments. Don't forget to like and follow. You can also check out my Instagram (@freelanceryagya_subtitler)

Thanks for reading,

Your best friend,

Yagya

Email:- yagyanshigupta796@gmail.com

Instagram:- @freelanceryagya_subtitler

See you soon Anees…..❤️

Love love