When Today I woke up, there was an unrealistic feeling which just touched me. The feeling was so refreshing but at the same time it was annoying. Past memories were hitting me hard,  knowing that we love each other a lot. He misses me a lot. All those old memories were playing in my mind. I was numb don't know what to do. It was little bit scary but I miss him each day. Not a single day is passed without him. It's been more than 2 years but looking at him I just feel different, special, rare. My heartbeat were not ready to stop, as if he is calling me, he wants me. This is not something I experience regular but, today. Distracting myself didn't helped me. watery eyes made him miss more and more. why are we apart ? why can't he come back ? am I that bad ? can't he see my love ?  

so I played his songs which he use to play in his car. He was such a sweet personality, very much humble,  innocent and well behaved. Hard to find this type of men. Tall, smart, handsome and well educated. We were from the same school. we had common friends. His nature, behavior impressed me. The way he love his family, take cares of his mom just made me fall more for him. He was a proper gentlemen and so perfect for me.  But he didn't had that strong feeling for me. But he use to express feeling for me he liked me very much. 

I experience my love of life so closely but unfortunately I can't have him.

He choose the other girl and continued with her. I felt ditched, cheated. But at last it was his choice. I can't control him on that. so I disappeared from his life. Later he came back saying he missed me a lot. At that time he was in relationship but looking at him I felt he is not happy he should deserve more. But still I was unable to anything. Because he was still with another girl. This time for the very first time he said I LOVE YOU to me. I was on the cloud. Those words were just dancing in front of me. He wanted to continue with me but he was so confused. Then this time I decided and took the decision not to meet each other because it was tough for me to stay half- loved which I don't deserve. So again I disappeared from his life. 

Third meeting - Gave a shocking news. He is married but unhappy. He has his own sad story which is very shocking and unbelievable. How come the boy like him make this kind of decision and mistakes? He was trapped between the wrong people such a sweet soul. I was feeling very bad for him. This time again he said I came back to be with you. And this time i don't know how to feel my feelings vanished. I didn't want him to come like this to me! 

Later, after few days the old chapter repeated. He again choose her and left  me. He blocked me from his entire life. I was his Half-girlfriend.

He is special, was special and will be forever.

Deep down in my heart it was full of silence. knowing that I will never get my love back. it's was just a fairytale and fairytale are never real. Destiny played a unfair game. Princess is lonely - left alone. 

Thank you.