Hi Rose,

I know you are struggling to smile, and I have noticed that you are not enjoying the things you used to enjoy before. I have seen you engrossed in your book when you read it, and how can I forget the times when you glow with the new plot twist you came up with while you write your fantasies onto the computer screen. Not to mention the happiness you used to feel when you get that perfect shot. But… It has changed now. I don't see any of them anymore. I don't see you reading or writing or enthusiastic about anything at all.

When I see you with your face all gloomy, I feel bad, not willing to start a conversation with anyone. You avoid interactions, and when you are forced to, you are left alone with nothing to talk about. I sometimes wonder where your friends are. I often hear you say that you don't have many friends. It doesn't matter if you have only a few friends; what matters is that they are around when they need you. Not opening up to anyone about the things that run in your mind doesn't help you; you cannot blame it for not having friends.

I know you are sensitive and you feel judged when you talk about your problems to your friends. I know that it isn't easy for you to say out loud what makes you sad. Even if you are talking about it for the nth time, I know that you are going through the same amount of pain the way you felt it. 

You are unique and special, so please stop underestimating yourself. Don't belittle you. I know that you have been having suicidal thoughts. Even though nothing has gone wrong in your life, you feel like you are worthless. You are trying your best to meet your parents' expectations, but you think it is not enough. All your life you have been concentrating on one thing and I know that your family's happiness is what matters to you more than anything else in this whole wide world. 

I know that you try hard to love yourself. First of all, please understand that being sensitive is not a drawback; many creative people worldwide are sensitive. I am sorry that sometimes I didn't prioritize you when all you had was just me. I am sorry for running after other people and their happiness when I had to take care of you and your satisfaction. I am sorry because I knew what you wanted and couldn't be a good friend to you.

But let us leave all those things behind. I am here just for you. Let's start together prioritizing you.

With lots of love

Yours lovingly

Me