As I sat down to write something, I feel low, lost and restless!

I wish I had answer, there happen numerous things and circumstances mundane, yet something is putting me down. I wonder what it is!

Is it because of that person, whom I talk and hangout everyday?, or is it because of the change in my perceptions towards the person. 

The person whom I used to have conversation with does not excite me anymore!

Nor does the other feels excited!

Change is welcomed but such a drastic change, I never did. The character that felt appealing, appreciating and lovable, is  not making me feel the same anymore. I wish it did. Does the four lettered L word ask for it anytime?. I do not when was the last time I felt loved!

It is really hard to sense that unlovingness and it becomes even harder to accept that fact, if u realize!

All books, movies, writers, novels and so on speak about love itself :).

None told how to unlearn love and get over it. Even they are not aware, may be!

In a process of your growth towards self pleasure, none teaches you.

You got to learn!

I wonder why do all of the sad songs, poems relate to me, when read. Just to remind me of the same, that I am low, I guess!

All I want is mental peace, no pleasing these days.

Just to be alone and vibe alone. I read this somewhere that, there will that one person, who can take care of you, fall for you and be there for you, till the end!, and that is you and only you.

I do not even know is it okay?, to feel this and write this blog. But I am because I need to better myself, pick myself up, and tell myself that “done and dusted”. Try to motivate myself, in such a way that none gets to know that I am dealing or have dealt with such a scene!

Is it possible?, or am I exaggerating that I can?. I don't have an answer, I apologize. I wish had answer to a storm my questions on my mind, before I burst out!

The whole trauma sucks, feeling restless, non productive, sleeping, not being able to eat and everything I read or talk or hear being relatable to my actual phase!

To be continued,

Note: No deep emotions, it is just the way I am feeling these days!