Hi boss, in today's blog, I'm gonna talk about whether depression is real or not.

In the past, being depressed was not considered to be a health problem, the people who were depressed were blamed and probably criticized as "lazy people" or “weak people”. But as the awareness of mental health started spreading on the internet, the amount of people being depressed started skyrocketing. Because now the people who are depressed, get support and sympathy. So, some humans have started faking depression :D, I have seen some of these people in real life. While the really depressed ones are trying to hide it and to “fake it till you make it”. These fakers are expressing openly and constantly talking about depression. Some even fake it, just so their friends pamper them. They think depression and sadness are the same thing.

The fakers believe that depression can be cured by good music. What do you think depression is? Is it some Vecna curse or what? 

Depression for me, was an experience were I could no longer do anything that I love. I couldn't listen to songs, couldn't watch movies. I was just mentally dead and in severe need for support or death. The struggle of fighting the urge to die every single day is real. Till 17 I was the most happiest soul, you would have ever met. But after my 18th birthday, when I lost all hope on my dreams, and I started believing that I am stuck with this life which I hate. I was gone.

The girl who skipped instead of walking, rapped instead of talking was gone. That little girl used to talk to the moon and thank for the little things that she has. She was gone before I even realized. 

I was crying a lot, sleep schedule got mixed up, but I didn't realize that this was depression. Things got worser and worser, but no one knew because it was an inner battle. I loss appetite for food and life. I have still not eaten food that makes me feel good, in fact I go days without eating properly. I was not eating well, since I had no desire to live. Taking care of myself was impossible to do. Not eating was making me weaker, and I wouldn't have energy to do my work. It was a loop.

I don't even remember how I broke out of it, but re-inventing myself was helpful. I would just watch people that made me happy, and when I realized that everyone is struggling in some way or form, I wanted to make my life better. Not kms was the only thing that guided me out of it. Because as much as I wanted to end it, I kept believing that it was not the solution. Thanks to me being indecisive to my core.

I think depression is an experience where you lose sense of self, you know longer know the person you were, they died. I don't know how I could have avoided it. But now that I've been through and out of it all alone, I am sure I wouldn't do that to myself again. 6 months of not thinking about death is a great achievement too.

People who grow and live in the lack of unconditional love are the ones who get affected mostly, even though some are biological. Google says that one out of 10 adults are depressed, and half of them are severe.

The unaffected ones think that mental issues like depression, anxiety and being suicidal are hypothetical like the unicorn. And that they were created by the people with a victim mentality. But you have to be on the darker side of life to realize that these experiences are as real as the presence of air. 

Hope you liked this blog, share your thoughts in the comments.

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Thank you for reading <3

love, jay.