Let's start with the basics, most of us live in the home we're born in. But in most patriarchal cultures, the woman after marriage is expected to live with the man. In India, the Hindu marriage system expects woman not only to completely shift in the man's house, but also to change her surname, in a way the identity she was born with, has lived with it and many a times has created that identity, for many many years. 

With this, there are many other changes in a woman's life, from the way she dresses up, to the way the presents herself in front of people. But the worst part among all these is that after marriage a woman's home changes. It is often told by the society “Betiyan to paraya dhan hoti hain” meaning daughters are someone else's property. I feel this phrase is so wrong, that too in so many ways. Firstly no female, or rather no human is anyone's property. Secondly, when we say that they are someone else's property, we directly imply that they do no belong to the house they are born into And thirdly, whoever marries the daughter owns her.

We forget that women are humans not only with flesh and blood but also with feelings and emotions. Due to this sense of ownership in the in-laws and spouse, a lot pressure is created on the women. Though this thinking leads many social evils like dowry death and domestic violence, this article has another problem in focus. 

It is not a widely accepted problem due to its less severity physically, but after marriage, the girl struggles mentally, because in the end she's got no place she can call “her” home. While the husband conveniently settles in his own old routine with his family, the woman's whole world changes. It becomes very obvious for her to miss her home and her parents. 

Her parents home becomes a place where she has to take permission and then go, and that too for the time she's allowed to go. Even in the most progressive section of the society, it is somewhere imbibed in the thoughts that the girl has to take permission not only form her husband but also from his family  members, to go to the place she once used to live in. This often leads to post marriage depression in women, making the women unhappy in what ought to be a fairly happy  marriage.

This idea of taking permission to go back to meet one's own parents seems very crooked to me. Though this is not a very recognized problem of married women (because it is one of the least severe problem), but it is really important to understand for everyone that women and daughters are not anybody's property to own. 

However, this practice makes me wonder, where really is a woman's home after marriage? Why should one require permissions to go back to one's own home? When such requests are denied by the husband or in-laws how can the women be expected to be happy in the marriage?