I know you have come across this title many times online and offline. There is no doubt that this is the most searched topic online nowadays. We are all in search of happiness and we believe doing something we will be rewarded with happiness. Some people might advise you to follow your heart to find happiness. Some others say the root cause of you not finding happiness is that you follow your heart which is an emotional guide, so follow the logical guide- Brain and find happiness. After reading all these articles, watching motivational videos and reading self-help books by famous authors, are we happy? Are you happy? 

Before reading further, I would like to ask you a question-

“ Is happiness the destination or Is it the Journey?” 

After reading this article, try answering this question by yourself to find an answer you were seeking all your life. 

Now let us discuss some very general norms that are said to be happy. The very first one is to follow our heart. By telling you to follow your heart it is meant to focus on our emotional needs. Like, for example, imagine yourself in love with someone. You tell them you love them but they reject your love because of some reasons. But as you are in love with the person you are unable to understand the logic behind these reasons. You will start feeling like loving them and see the love reciprocate is the only way of being happy. That is what your emotions demand at the moment, but if you give yourself to your emotions you will not be happy and your logical mind knows that. But even then you follow your heart and end up being sad and depressed. So think, is it wise to invest in your emotions to be happy? 

The second way is to focus on the logical side to be happy- that is to follow our brain.  We live in a competitive world. Here we have to be more logical than emotional. But ignoring your emotions completely in the name of logicality can be disastrous. Let us take an example, say, you are offered a job in a multinational company with high pay. You are to work 6 days a week and 9 hours per day. Imagine you are from a poor family and you have to feed your family, educate your children and take care of your old parents and for all these things you have to find money and the company is going to pay you well. You know that the work is going to drain all your energy but thinking logically, thinking about all the responsibilities, a more rational and logical choice is to take up the job. You take the job, you work hard, you earn money and you do all your responsibilities well.  But at the cost of giving up time spent with your family. Was that something you wanted? Are you happy? 

We have seen two cases wherein we saw how thinking only emotionally and only logically will end up. There are some other things like, follow your passion and love yourself to be happy. We live in a society, we can ignore what they say and do if that is affecting our inner peace, but we are a social animal and if we completely ignore this fact we will never grow. The key is to grow together, not to grow alone. Loving others is as important as loving yourself. 

Passion is something that gives meaning to your existence. Your passion may not always earn you money, which is necessary to live in the world today. But doing what you love will always make you content. So passion is not a career option, it is a way of living, a path that makes you the real you and not a career that pays you well. 

What do you feel now? You will be confused. If these are not the ways then what is the way to be happy? Happiness is not something to seek for. It is not a destination to follow a path and reach it eventually. It is not a reward that will be paid at the end of a task.  Happiness is not a destination, it is the journey. It is the sum total of all those little moments, the beautiful memories, the conversations with your loved ones, the meditation and the love. Sit back and think to yourself, the things that you thought would bring happiness, have they brought you the happiness? The answer is both, yes and no. But when you think about the journey, the memories and moments, they were happy and beautiful. 

We think happiness is something we achieve in the end so we tend to ignore the little things and dream of a happy tomorrow that may or may not exist. Enjoy the little things and make the journey memorable and that is how you will be happy. It is about being happy not searching for happiness. Like Sadhguru said,

“Happiness starts with you. Not with your relationships, not with your job, not with your money but with YOU.” 

So be the change. Happiness is a way of life and is different for everyone. Try finding your way and inspire others to do the same by telling your experience.

© Ganga Ambily Gopi