Some scars, whether physical or emotional, never entirely heal. You learn to live with them and adapt your life to them. I had to force myself to forget because certain scars never heal.

This is a strong emotion, and true healing takes time. It could be years or decades. Scars, like physical injuries, may persist. Unlike physical scars, emotional scars, can be painful at times. So there is suffering, which comes in waves. Forced myself to forget... thus I forgot the good and terrible... and, as a result, a portion of my life.

I've always thought that the quickest way to mend a wounded heart is to fall in love again. I know this isn't a common viewpoint, but it worked for me. It also came with a complete realization that the relationship had ended. I never hated anyone; it's just that I was angry at them for hurting me, or it could have been a mistake that I had higher expectations of them. Healing may have occurred, and one may be doing well, but this does not imply returning to their periodic lifestyle. That's where I am now. Better, but not as good as before.

There were good moments, but BAD always won out over time. I stumbled and fell several times in front of my mother's eyes. Even if I tried, I couldn't live up to her expectations!!! I was still alive, and I pondered how I had survived those formative years... …

Humans are hardwired to run away from pain. We've survived this way, but it's not how we recover. When someone hurt us, they touch a part of us that requires our love. We go into survival mode when we are harmed since most don't know how to love. We may run away, grow numb, shrink, or strike out in wrath. They are usually expressed in a desperate attempt to reject our current circumstances. They are born from pain and display wrath. If you say something like, "This is something I will never forgive you for," you are expressing the venomous reflection of the ego, which is designed to cast our grief onto the person we believe is to blame.

Another possibility is, "How could you possibly do this to me?" These are the words that escape our mouth in shock, the result of your heart and mind colliding. They are also employed to try to deny reality.

As someone once remarked, pain is always unique and personal, and I treasured that anguish for a long time. And I'd like to be forgiven for holding on to those memories for so long. Now I've decided to let go of the beautiful pain I used to feel. I'm only doing it for me.