The video of a woman repeatedly slapping a cab driver has gone viral and soon enough we have resurgence of posts and memes calling for ‘gender equality’, bashing ‘pseudo feminism’ and claiming how patriarchy is a thing of the past. This post is not to weigh the facts and determine who the culprit is and who is to be blamed, rather understand how misogyny use such opportunities to demean and lambast feminism and shift it's responsibility from the cruelties it inflicts on women on a daily basis.

Misogyny frequently involves morality take-downs or the unforgiving shaming of women for their real/supposed moral errors 

Kate Mann 

The recent incident is a perfect example of this observation by philosopher Kate Mann from her work Down Girl: The Logic of Misogyny. But what is interesting and at the same time not uncommon to Indians is how this incident is used to the belittle and tarnish the whole feminist movement. We have also seen how achievements of women are also used in this fashion to lecture strong and independent women on how their feminism is not the ‘real feminism’. This is not the first time these things are happening and Indians particularly have an obsession with it. 

It is conspicuous that majority of the people who claim this would have been different if the man hit the women is not interested in getting the man justice, but see this as an opportunity to launch a harsh diatribe on feminism and women in general. Why the actions of a woman, questions about whether she is right or wrong aside, is used to judge a whole ideology and a gender. Let's consider another incident, a 9-year-old girl was raped, murdered and forcefully cremated in Delhi a few days ago. But why don't we see an outrage similar to above incident against a whole gender? 

The answer to this lies in the very structure of Indian society. With injustice and inequality at it's core, both our public and private spaces are plagued with archaic notions and prejudices against women and other marginalized sections. The men who benefit largely from this patriarchal structure doesn't even acknowledge the achievements of the women in their own homes and their struggles are invisible to them. Independent women, their achievements and very own existence are therefore enough to create anxiety for this fragile male ego. So whenever there's even the slightest slip, when one woman err or a situation where there is real or supposed moral error from women, they use this opportunity to launch a grinding tirade to blame women for everything, adroitly concealing all their defects.

It is very interesting to see how dignity for all sexes and equal rights become the talk of the town when moral failing of one woman rail up this male ego. We hardly see them speaking against the mental, physical and emotional abuse men face unless there is a situation which involve women committing a real/supposed moral error. The immunity men receive from the patriarchal structure coupled with caste and religious privileges constitute the foundation of every atrocities and violence against women. So how to cover this up? Blame women whenever possible and bash feminism for everything. The misconstrued notion that feminism stands for the emasculation of men also contribute to this, which is as faulty and similar to how Indian's consider criticising the government is equivalent to criticising the nation.

When we are blaming and criticising others, it also means that we are avoiding some truths about ourselves. In the case of Indian men, they have a lot to avoid than mere truth about themselves. Blaming women and feminism helps them in evading the responsibility of their misdeeds and make sure that justice will never reach the victims of patriarchy and misogyny. Also, it is easy to blame women than educating men not to be threats. It helps them to continue in their privileged position uncontested. Similar to how struggles of women are invisible to Indian men, they will never acknowledge the fact that it is the feminist movement, they always blame, which addresses the issues faced by not just men but also other genders. And this is something they will never be able to address, including the #NotAllMen brigade and other folks who pop up only when there is an occasion when someone or a group from the gender they represent do something extremely gross and vile.

So coming back to our first incident, the cab driver had filed a compliant with the police and a probe has been launched. So let's hope the one who is guilty will be arrested and punished. We haven't seen any feminist group supporting the woman nor her actions. But how did we jump to the conclusion that this the doing of feminism? How did one real/supposed failing of a single woman enable us to pass judgement on a gender as a whole. And how is this not applicable in the case of men and why they are protected from this unfair trial? All this points to how patriarchy contaminate and poison our society and make us misconstrue feminism for what it is not. Feminism is an evolving movement and it is not infallible. We must understand that a woman slapping a cab driver for some unknown reason has got nothing to do with feminism. She hasn't said she's a feminist but were busy to tag her as ‘feminist’ with our obsolete and faulty notion of what feminism is. So for those confused souls still wondering what a feminist is 👇

Though the hopes for this society to change is utopian. Hope, as always, is not a bad thing. So let us hope.