I overheard a conversation while I was scrolling through my Mobile. Actually, I was pretending to scroll because I wanted to listen what these two women were talking about, obviously they weren’t loud, they were gossiping!!! Shuuuuu…

So, they were talking of this newlywed couple which was having many family issues. One of the many was that the mother-in-law was not cool about the girl wearing salwar suit. She was expected to be wearing a saree all the time.

As astonishing as this was for me, to hear something so orthodox what hurt me even more was the conversation that followed. The two women, which I should mention were young, almost the age of the married girl, continued to talk. One of them said, “that girl shouldn’t have married into that family in the first place if she couldn’t even listen to her mother-in-law and not make a small change in her lifestyle.”

I was numb. I could not think for a moment. I couldn’t believe what I had just heard. A girl talking about another in such an objective way. Not that we would be interfering in someone’s family matter to make things right, but at least respect the women’s will, her life, her being. She is not just a daughter- in- law she is a girl with feelings. She has a brain to think, a heart to wish things. 

Marriage is a life changing thing. It’s a big decision too. The couple may make it work happily, but the pressure from the in-laws, the society, to live by their expectations makes it hard for the couple too. Same was the case here, the couple was really happy together, they enjoyed each other’s company. It was the mother-in-law that was making it unbearable. 

The mother-in-law’s mindset is not easy to be changed at her age. But we can change. Most of the harassment of women all over the world would stop if we women treated each other with love, respect and sympathy. The girl saying those things was wrong. An issue as small as what clothes should be wore should not be associated with the decision to marry into a certain family. We live in the 21st century, and still do we expect clothing habits to decide whether or not to marry into a certain family? 

It is only possible for women to stay happily married if all the women related to her support her! Whether it is her mother, mother-in-law, sister, or just random women gossiping about her personal life. When we talk in favor of a woman’s rights we make a better place for ourselves, our sisters and daughters.

We must be sympathetic, loving and caring and supporting to each other. That is also a way to teach our men to do the same. We do what we see. When the men see their mothers, sisters, wives, friend talk respectfully of other women, that’s what they learn. 

Change now.