The next stage after postpartum is the MOMMY'S guilt. I don't think there is a mother on earth that is immune to experiencing mom guilt. And for the working mothers, it is even more worse. Having to leave the baby when they go for work, having a feeling of not taking care of the baby by themself or if they have to quit their job to see to their baby's needs are all the things running in the minds of mothers.
Of course, mum-guilt does not just exist in these bigger issues such as breastfeeding or paid employment – we can grant ourselves access to mum guilt in most situations. We feel guilty each time we feel frustrated or yell at our kids (it particularly seems to hit when we see them sleeping at night!) We feel guilty for snapping when our kids don’t eat dinner. We feel guilty when we dare go away for a weekend with friends. We feel guilty when we may slightly put our needs first. Whatever the situation, we can find something to feel guilty about.
Since mom guilt is at every turn, identifying areas where you can actually choose to avoid guilt is a welcome blessing. Pick your battles. You may feel guilty that there are dishes piling up in the sink or the mess to be cleaned up, but an impromtu dance party in the middle of the mess will always win. At the end of the day, no matter how stressed, tired and guilty you may feel, that emotion is instantly melted away once you hear that little voice say "I Love You, Mom. Face it, this is what fuels us and makes everything okay in the end.
Take it easy. Self care is not being selfish. Take some time for yourself -Go out, read books, sleep or do whatever is relaxing for you! Always remember-- when you ignore your needs, you're teaching your children to ignore themselves. When you put yourself last, you're teaching your children to put themselves last. Humans are social beings and babies will adapt to it. All it takes is some extra time.
Feeling mom guilt from time to time is completely normal. And it’s okay to experience it, as long as you have strategies to deal with it. Otherwise, feelings of mom guilt can cloud your judgment as a parent and prevent you from connecting with your kids.
Children grow up and start living their own life. So put away the guilt you are having, because you are exactly the mother whom your baby needs!!
