My dear Ex Best Friend,

You were the soul to my body. The bond that we shared, I could not be able to have again with anyone. You used to be my diary whose every page was filled with different moments, many unforgettable memories and some precious bonds. The diary I would never want to share with anyone. But from the day you confessed me your feelings, it just somewhere lost. The bond we had, the time we'd spent now seems to be a blur picture. Now I don't feel looking to that diary back. I don't know how to explain this, but now I think twice before sending you any texts.

I remember what happened next. The moment you cut the call after telling how you felt. We stopped. We stopped everything. I was left with a huge hole that I had nothing to fill with. 

I do not understand how I am living my life without you. Sometimes, I feel that you have ruined everything and blame you. Sometimes, I think it was me who was responsible for all the suffering that we both had faced.

I know it was hard for you, too, to feel the way you felt about me and not getting the same love and affection back. Here's a confession. I wasn't clueless. It was just so unexpected that I couldn't get the time to think. And yes, I enjoyed your company and the attention you gave me, the way you'd listen to all my crazy stories, answer my 2 am questions…yes we had our moments but I guess I just never could make myself feel more.

Trust me, I tried. I tried to do every freaking things to make things work out. Even on some days, I just felt like saying yes just to have you back, just be able to text you again about every little thing that happened around me. But I know it would be so unfair to you. Believe it or not, I cared about you. I thought of not hurting you.

So I let you go. I'm not sure that it was right or wrong but I found it the right decision at that time. I lost a best friend that day. A friend who was always by my side in every tough situation. Now after all this, I've definitely learnt to not be so open with anyone until or unless I want to show them that I'm interested. No more 2 am texts to people.

To be very honest to myself, yes I miss you sometimes.

And I know that's okay.

I hope you're having a good life.

Take care

Me