I love kids, not in the ‘I am a pedo’ way, but in a ‘you are so cute I wanna pull your cheeks’ way.

I love them because they are so dumb and make me feel like the smartest person in the room. They are so full of joy, so full of hope, and so naïve. and I love it when  I see joy disappearing from their face when I tell them, ‘you are adopted.’

Ask any kid what they want to be, and they'll say - ‘I want to change the world’, ‘I want to be an astronaut’, ‘I want to cure cancer’, ‘I want to be a lawyer’, and other noble things. LOL.

Ask an adult what they want to be, and their reply will be ‘I just want to be happy, man.’

That being said, do you know what makes me happier? A kid falling down while holding an ice cream - the scoop being splattered all over the ground, the cone being crushed in their tiny hand because they held onto it too tight. (And if they start crying, that's even better.)

I know what you all are thinking right now:  what an idiot. He is so evil.

But I am not. You laugh when your best friend falls, but if I laugh at some kid falling down, I am the bad guy?

On another note, do you have a voice inside your head that tells you to kick a kid for no reason? Do you look them straight into their eyes and assert dominance? Do you make scary faces at them so they have nightmares?

Do you take away their chocolate, make them cry, and then, give it back - becoming their messiah. That is satisfying, isn't it? Do you make sure to win all the games, and then, tease them?

No? Right, right. That is my answer, too. I don't think like that either, man. ‘Bache bhagwaan ka roop hote hai’ totally. Cool. Cool! No stress. No stress at all. 

Enough jokes. Truthfully, I love kids. I love it when a baby holds onto my finger a little too tight. I love it when a random kid in the metro smiles at me. I love it when I give chocolates to kids at the airport before I kidnap them - KIDDING!!!

On a completely unrelated note, here is a picture of me laughing. what do you think I was laughing at?