It's been almost a week since the month of July has begun and also the second half of 2023. This year is going so fast and neither of us can believe it. Maybe not a lot happened this year but this lot of time has passed I believe. Now that July has begun and also I turned a year older three weeks ago, I have made a list of what I am going to do and stick to and follow it thoroughly and maintain its consistency. I am not here to share the list and all, but to rather share some thoughts of how things have been so far.

Usually, when June ends I feel sad but sometimes it compensates with a month-ending thing that might make you feel good. Last year June was pretty much satisfactory because I had done a lot of things i.e., the solo trip so it was certainly a satisfying month-end for sure.

This year since you are too busy adulting, you don't really care of how the month is ending or starting as you aren't looking forward to anything at the moment. (Well, you should and I know you do but you don't think too much about it. For instance, your birthday this year, you didn't really think of it even when the days were nearing.) That's how things have been lately, you don't look forward to it but when it happens, it happens. 

Now with the month of July, it doesn't feel right, to be honest. It is not a good start. I know it is only been a week and that I give it some time, but a part of me feels that something doesn't feel right. It is the summer holidays where everyone's going on vacation but not me. Because I have got a lot of work and deadlines, especially this month and you can't afford to let it go. But at the same time, you want to give it a rest and take it slow. Well, you can't go too slow. My only concern is not being able to meet with the deadlines and certain things not working out and not fully utilising the opportunities and so on and so forth.

It has nothing to do with laziness and not certainly a lack of motivation but probably an overwhelming feeling altogether. I hope the month is kind to me and a part of me feels that it is going to be hard. If so, please give me the courage and strength to deal with it.