Now a days it is hard to find love. People run after attractive faces, attractive bodies, money, status and what not. So basically it's just lust. A lust of getting the best. But what about love? Love can come into your lives in many forms. It's not just always about a couple. Love can not be defined like that but it is about how you feel for someone. For your parents, your grandparents, your siblings, your friends, your teachers and the list can go on. Yes obviously it is also about how you feel towards your partner. How secure you feel with them. Does they make your life complete? And then again a list of questions can go on this way. If you are lucky enough to have felt the feeling and got the same then what happens after a certain time? Do you feel the same every day or you just don't feel anything?

If I tell you about my life here then I was in a happy long distance relationship from the past three years. We were colleagues. And it was just a friendship. He was a decent guy, had never dated a girl before and even wasn't ready to get into a relationship one. He just suddenly started calling me after office and would talk to me about what he ate in dinner and all the stuff. I didn't give it much thought. Then I resigned and moved back to my hometown. As a said I never gave those conversations much thought. But in spite of the distance nothing changed. Now the conversations grew longer. He would text me all day long, then would call me. He even helped me in my worst times. He came to my hometown for my birthday. We both share our birthdays in the same month. His is just two days apart from mine. Things were great and still we were not in any kind of relationship until one day I moved back to Gurgaon for a job. 

I had a friend there from college and I decided to meet him so called him at my place. When my friend from the office(let's call him X) called me I told him my friend from college(let's call him Y) is coming so I am ordering food. This didn't go well with X and he started shouting over the phone which I swear I didn't understand why he was doing it. So I told him not to shout on me and disconnected. Later Y came, we had dinner and all this while X kept calling me and told me to tell Y to go. I ignored. But at 1:30A.M someone started banging on my door and it was X. He was crying and said-"I don't trust anyone around you. Why don't you understand? I know he is your friend but still." And I was literally staring at him. I told him to calm down. He apologized to my friend and actually they both said the same thing that boys can not be trusted. Well whatever. Y left. I fought the whole night with X and in the morning I went to office, apologized to Y over a msg and texted X to leave. But when office got over I went back to my flat I saw X standing there. He had not left. I again fought with him though I understood his concern but he wasn't allowed to create a scene. To which he said-" I want to date you, I can't lose you." 

I took months to apprehend this conversation and in the meanwhile he did every thing for me. Eventually I said yes and we were the happiest couple. We were doing the long distance will full efforts. He invited me to his hometown. I stayed at his home. Met his family and all things were great. Then lockdown happened and I had to return to my hometown. I fights grew. He started a new job and met lots of people. Some girls even started texting him. And then one day I got a message that he is breaking up with me. I didn't understand. He blocked me everywhere. I contacted his friends. They all blocked me. It was so embarrassing until one day I saw his photo with a girl on a club's page. Later through our mutual friend I got to know that she was the same girl who was texting him and now they were together. This came as a shock to  me. And it's been over a year I think I am still stuck there. He had even asked me to marry him. I had told my family about him. 

So what happens after a breakup? I am 27 years old and I have indulged myself into various activities just to keep my mind busy. And now when my parents tell me to move on and meet some boys for marriage I tell you I get so scared. Because if the perfect one didn't last long then how am I going to someone new? I still think wasn't I enough? But then I tell myself I was more than enough!