This is my personal story. My wedding is an Indian arranged marriage. When i was around 25 years of age my parents started searching for a bridegroom, shortly they found one. The horoscopes matched , the family was comparable to our family in terms of property/ status. of course we were of the same caste. Once our marriage was  fixed. We started chatting over phone. As we started chatting over phone  there seemed to be a lot of differences between us. He seemed to be very dominating, overprotective/ possessive. He always asked me to wear a shawl / dupatta. I was not used to wearing one. He did not like jeans pant/ t-shirt. I discussed this with my mom and some of my friends. They told it will be  ok. Many people are like that Once you get married all these things will smoothen out . Once i showed him a photo of me wearing a black top, it was one of my favorite  tops ,I asked how i looked. to that he replied , “Give away the black top , we  do not wear black at home” I was shocked, Did he even consider my feelings. I had told hm it was my favorite just because they do not  wear it means how can i adapt immediately.

     One of things which bugged me a lot more than this  was he did not like volunteering/donating money to NGOs. It was one of things i was regularly doing. I told him you may not donate but pls do not restrict me.I was also earning around 35,000 to  45,000 per month. 1000rs to 2000s was not much . The horoscopes are matching , family is good family with these words my family consoled me.

 After marriage things went ugly.My in-laws moved in  with us so that we can take care of the baby, while i go to work. It started becoming hell. They would not allow me to have servant maid. My mother-in law wanted to pay the servant as she did in native place. We were living in a  metro. The servant maids demanded more  My husband did not seem to care. One thing thought it was difficult was my job I hung on to my job. My parents were also troubled due to my situation.  . There was so much fight , verbal battle. I did not know what to do . I cried to my parents .We took the horoscopes to the same person. he told they weren't matching. That is what I too thought before marrige!