The first cry of a girl child is still an alarm in the heart of parents. They may be happy, but still an alarm of a heavy responsibility start to bang in their ears from that day. Why this happening, Even in the new, educated, so called modern Indian society?
The main fear in growing up a girl is the dowry itself. Its an unwritten societial norm, even it is against law. Girls will be rejected if her parents are poor, if they cant meet the need of grooms family. Gold, money, car, house, utensils, home appliances, lands, and all are different kinds of so called gifts that grooms expect from the girls family.
Some will demand dawry on face and some asks indirectly. In some places, even the expense of marriage will also be responsibility of girls family. If we give all these and we send our daughters to other home, are they really happy there?
Next day grooms family starts to count the gold, money and expense of car.. If it is not upto their satisfaction, our daughters are getting treated badly in their family. Even her husband whom she expected to be her better half strats to torchur her.
Will our daughters complain about this to us anytime?why?From the day of birth a girls starts to hear, you will get married, going to another family. If a brother and sister starts to fight mom will console son, she will get married and go. Then, everything will be for you only. This makes a idea in girls child that, this is not her home, she belongs to somebody. She wont be supported anymore after she got married.
Whether boy or girl, they have equal rights to get love and caring of their parents, rights to get food and dress, right to equal education. Then why in some of our states, still girls are considered least important and education is a dream for them. Why they are considered only as thing to get married and doing household works.
When we teach our girls to clean vessels, clothes and home,we keep away our sons from all this.
We tell our girls to give food aand serve her brothers and elderly males in family and we make our sons feel that they are superior and girls have to serve him and the family. Whatever happens the girls should suffer and boys should be in safe side.
Our daughter will not complain about th torchur tha the fac du t dowry to anyone. They are going to suffer everything by themselfs. They are thinking that they are helpless and no body can do anything for her. This will push her into depression.
If at all they return tto their home and complain about this, parents wont accept aand support them. They will make her convince that, it happens and you have to adjust, this is not your home, after marriage that is your, you should respect them.. This helpless situation will lead them to Suicides
When our parenting will change?
When we will stop this dowry system?
This is happening amoung the educated, mordern societies. Then, what is the purpose of education and this high standard of living? There is no change in this system from centuries.
Start thinking about the psychological issues of our daughters. Lets support them. Dont grow a girl child only for marriage. Make her educated and independent. Make her able to take discissions and support even in her worst situation.
Tell your daughters that in any difficulties be free to approach your family and you will support them. Its her home always and parents will love and care her even after marriage.
A divorced daughter is always better than a dead daughter.
Be the change.
Support your daughters.
Thank you..
