I received a call yesterday from my mother, she said her mobile phone charger is broke and I was frustrated coz last year i gifted her brand new phone. Don't rush to any conclusion, I frustrated because I am flat broke and i am frustrated because i am unable to bring her new charger. Then i realise, why this is a fact that when boys have money they feel confident because over the period of time they knew that they only expected to make life easy for others and it can only be possible by having money. 

But i can't express my frustration to any one because middle class boys expected to stand strong no matter how sensitive you are? how much pain you have? how many wounds you have over your soul? The charger story is just a detonator to blast me off but wait i controlled it, to not blast in front of others but the beast inside me bites me hard to let it go, but you know, middle class rules, they trained us to kill every emotion. 

So today i tell you the beast that i, unintentionally, raised inside me who is very talkative who pushes me to talk, who fights with me to open up. Many I controlled it to not but sometimes it gets beyond limits so i go to bathroom and have conversation with him for about hours and people think that puberty Hits me, you know what i mean. Many times i realise that when this beast comes to know that i have something to talk with some one but i am unable to do so it bites me back and wounded me eg from past few days while cooking or working, i accidentally get cut the same spot of my finger again and again. One of my friend suggest me to drink to relaxes it but it didn't work because that best calls me even when i am not in my senses.

Once i tried to find out how these beast gets its existence then i come into conclusion that i have so many sensible emotions which are dieing to come out but i never allowed them so they collectively become the beast like venom in spider man. 

Now i trained this beast to listen me because it is the only one who knew me very deeply. As a middle class house boy i have to wear happening smily face even when i have nothing to cheer myself up, when i weep inside, when i need help to collect myself when i am broken, when i need shoulder to cry out loud and at this point of time only this beast comes to sits beside me and consoles me because asking for help to others is not middle class house family's cup of tea coz you know we are driven by the line log kya kahenge? 

"Kuchh to log kahenge logon ka kam hai kahna" this is good only for song not for reality. 

Thank you to read me this is DEEP NARAYAN SONI and this the story of me and the beast lies inside me, rent free.