Before beginning with my views on the topic “Importance of Empathy and the Desirability of a good EQ, in order to lead a balanced, stress free life”, I would like to give you a situation. Imagine a life without acknowledging or without feeling the need to acknowledge your thoughts and emotions. How did you feel? Weird. Isn’t it? Everybody, acting like robots to each other — no feelings, emotions, empathy or anything — just artificial intelligence (AI), machines and equipment, along with Intelligence Quotient (IQ).

But honestly, AI & IQ aren’t enough on their own to achieve success in life. Yes, your IQ can help you get into college and great universities, but it’s your EQ (Emotional Quotient) that will help you manage the stress and emotions when facing your final exams. IQ and EQ exist in tandem and are most effective when they build off one another.

Emotional intelligence (otherwise known as emotional quotient or EQ) is the ability to understand, use, and manage our emotions in positive ways so as to relieve stress, communicate effectively, empathize with others, overcome challenges and defuse conflict.

In this busy stressful life, an average person goes through thousands of emotions in twenty four hours of a day.

It is not okay to keep our feelings and emotions to ourselves, buried into our hearts and minds, instead we should let them out and free our hearts and minds.

It is also NOT okay to completely ignore our emotions, and focus on other things in life. Along with physical well-being, empathy and mental well-being is important too.

To bring a balance to this, one needs to master the art of emotional quotient in order to live a stress free and healthy life.

Although, emotionality has historically been portrayed as the reason for anger, competition and rivalry, foolish decisions. But literally, it can be a reason to happiness, to catch up an old bond, to love and friendships and to make great decisions as well.

Emotions are fundamental to our ability to function. They are bound to happen to us. We survive because of our emotions. They motivate us to act, are essential to social interactions, and form the bedrock of our felt sense of morality.

Emotional intelligence helps you build stronger relationships, succeed at school and work, and achieve your career and personal goals. It can also help you to connect with your feelings, turn intention into action, and make informed decisions about what matters most to you.

The following points will let you know how emotional intelligence will make you a better version of yourself

1. Self-management — You will be able to control impulsive feelings and behaviours, manage your emotions in healthy ways, take initiative, follow through on commitments, and adapt to changing circumstances.

2. Self-awareness — You will start recognizing your own emotions and how they affect your thoughts and behaviour. You will know your strengths and weaknesses, and will have self-confidence.

3. Social awareness — You will have empathy. You will be able to understand the emotions, needs, and concerns of other people, pick up on emotional cues, feel comfortable socially, and recognize the power dynamics in a group or organization. You will know whom to include in your circle, and whom not to.

4. Relationship management — You will get to know how to develop and maintain good relationships, communicate clearly, inspire and influence others, work well in a team, and manage conflict.

A good Emotional Quotient can impact us at –

Performance at school or work. High emotional intelligence can help understand the social complexities of the workplace, lead and motivate others. In fact, nowadays when it comes to placing important job candidates, many companies now rate emotional intelligence as important as technical ability and employ EQ testing.

Physical health. If you’re unable to manage your emotions, you are probably not managing your stress either. This can lead to serious health problems. The first step to improving emotional intelligence is to learn how to manage stress.

Mental health. Uncontrolled emotions and stress can also impact your mental health, making you vulnerable to anxiety and depression. If you are unable to understand, get comfortable with, or manage your emotions, you’ll also struggle to form strong relationships. This in turn can leave you feeling lonely and isolated and further exacerbate any mental health problems.

Relationships & bonds. By understanding your emotions and how to control them, you will be able to express how you feel and understand how others are feeling. This allows you to communicate more effectively and forge stronger relationships, both at work and in your personal life. This is how you will be able to live a balanced life.

Now, I would like to share my own story as to how I became a victim of low emotional quotient. Rewinding back to 2020, during the covid-19 pandemic, we were all left in our homes with lockdown. My school was over and the college admissions had not begun, so I used to be lazy, doing nothing, which eventually led to the habit of scrolling social media more often. I used to observe people on Instagram, and there came a point where I had started comparing myself to the people on social media, be it the models, the celebrities, and with the ones who started their online businesses. My thoughts kept reminding me that “they are doing so much, but I am doing nothing”. This impacted my mental health in a whole negative way. I felt completely lost. I remember crying in my mother’s lap, telling her how worthless I was, even though I knew that social media is not real. I started having an inferiority complex, I was not speaking to any of my friends and always wanted to be isolated. It was depressing as I couldn’t control my emotions. If I could have controlled my thoughts, things might have shifted into a positive way.

Here comes the role of Emotional Intelligence. I could have given time to myself, I could have understood my emotions, but I did not as I did not have developed EQ. I did not know how to manage my stress and depression, which made the situation worse.

How can you control your emotions? How can you have a great EQ?

I carried on forward, tried to improve myself in order to be the best version of myself and I’m still improving myself.

From my personal experience, Meditation has helped me a lot to relax my mind. Meditating for 5–10 minutes a day, early morning had a soothing effect on my brain. Meditation exercises can be helpful for EQ because being mindful of emotions facilitates understanding and insight into emotional experiences.

Secondly, I had deactivated my social media for a while, in order to have a detox. So I came up with this formula — LESS SCREEN TIME, MORE REAL TIME. The more we’re engrossed in our screens, the more we’re prone to fall victim to lesser emotional intelligence. This brings me to my next point.

Instead of wasting time on social media, I started to read a few self-help books. As a beginner, I started with Vex King’s books. I used to listen to Jay Shetty’s podcasts too.

I picked up a hobby, started investing time in cooking, art and craft, dancing and picked up a skill to learn. This kept me away from being swayed into my negative emotions. And my progress motivated me, which kept me going. You too can pick up a hobby in order to distract yourself from your negative thoughts, which will ultimately heal you.

Spending time and laughing with your loved ones can, too, make your day a thousand times better. Be with people who encourage and motivate you and build up a positive aura. If you live alone, make a habit of snuggling your pets or maybe play with the stray animals. This might sound childish, but honestly, all your stress will go away in a few minutes!!! It brings an automatic serotonin to the brain!

I used to go out for walks to calm my mind, or just spent 15–20 minutes with nature — observing the sky, observing the plants, birds, animals. If not walks, then exercise. It energises your body and makes you feel happier. Although this is much underrated, I 100% recommend it.

Last but not the least, journal your thoughts, practice gratefulness and consume healthy food.

Following all these, has helped me shape myself into a better human, physically and mentally. I’m able to filter my thoughts now. I have a better EQ than before and am still developing it.

A great EQ can help us in being balanced with life, with work, with stress.

Successful humans have a great EQ along with a great IQ and AQ (Adaptability Quotient).

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Coming up with other stuff soon, stay tuned. Thankyou!