10 Ways To Be A Good Listener: The Art of Active Listening 10 Ways To Be A Good Listener: The Art of Active Listening
Whether it’s online, or in-person, the greatest communication skill is listening. You should listen with an open mind. You should listen with a loving heart. You should listen with patience and respect. You should listen as if what you are hearing is sacred, and important. Even if you have a full schedule, it is vital that you always make time to listen. Listening is a tool to prevent misunderstandings, minimize mistakes, and improve relationships. Can you think of a situation where you would be better off not speaking, but instead listening? Listening is a tool to increase the likelihood of coming to a decision that is harmonious, while being respectful and loving to others.
Enjoy your listening experience Know how to act during your listening Provide guidance during your listening Avoid judging during your listening For more tips to be a great listener, check out our list of the best audio books on Audible here.
What am I not getting? Pay attention Step back Actively seek to understand Follow up At the end of the meeting, pick up your phone and email the people you were talking to and share: My conversation had a great impact and I am sharing with you my take on the conversation. Thanks again for your time today. Sincerely, You 12. Be sure to clarify and provide comments that others can follow up on. 13. Be careful of setting expectations before the meeting and showing too much deference. 14. Be consistent with your statements. 15. Don’t forget to offer ways to connect after the meeting. 16. Be decisive and stick with your decision. Be ready for any follow up questions, and be open to feedback. Be sure to let the team know how you are processing it. 17.
Practice the Golden Rule Stop talking Be Specific Be firm Cultivate active listening Empathize Allow a space for your listener to respond Examine, Pause, & Consider Try these examples Listen first. Try it. Listen more closely and slower. If you are one of my friends (thank you!), you probably know that one of my pet peeves is people who talk at me. I’m not sure why, but the fact that people are talking is not enough. I need them to actually listen to me. This habit of mine comes from my limited experience with the communication world. My childhood friends who liked to talk talked without giving me a chance to talk back. The boys I played volleyball with would start to talk about the next big game. So, I would start talking about the weather.
Listening actively requires empathy, not just a desire to understand. The last thing we want is for our listener to feel disconnected from our words. But the way we phrase our questions can affect the way our listener responds, especially if we phrase our questions in the form of a question. Our question should be phrased as though we care about the other person. The second we frame our question in the form of a question, our listener is more likely to respond with an honest and empathetic response. Active listening requires you to pay attention to what you are saying. Focus on showing respect By respecting your listeners’ humanity, respect for their voice, and respect for their needs, you can help your listener feel heard.
Create an environment that is conducive to effective listening. Invite the other person into a calm space, away from phones, TVs, and other distractions. You’ll be amazed at how much more you can hear, without being distracted by your phone, the air conditioning, or your kids. Avoid questions It’s not ok to interrupt someone. Don’t ask “oh really” or other leading questions in an attempt to draw out the other person. Ask open-ended questions instead: What did you mean by _____, or why did you think _____? These questions invite more thought and reflection. Follow up and listen, then answer. If you don’t ask follow-up questions, the person may never hear you. If you only listen, they may not know how to find out more about you.
Listening is not something you do when you’ve got something else to do, but something that requires your full attention. In order to actually listen well, you need to be clear on what the person is telling you. You need to understand what their needs are and use active listening to express your empathy and interest in their situation. Also, when you’re doing a good job, you’re not letting the other person do all the talking. It’s good to indicate the time you want to hear from them. You should also make sure they know that you’re listening to them. Listen for behavioral cues We often tell our children not to interrupt or talk over others. This is a lesson that we have to learn, too. How can you expect someone to keep talking if you don’t do the same for them?
If someone is in the middle of telling a story, you should be completely engaged. Too often, I see people with their heads down or their cell phone and they're not really listening. It's frustrating to be interrupted when someone is in the middle of sharing something important with you. You're their hero No matter what your job is, if you're asking for their time to listen to you, it feels good to know that you've earned this person's respect and you've made them happy. This can be a real ice breaker and help you to get better results. Listen and ask questions This is a great tool to get your questions answered and can be a fantastic tool to reinforce and confirm what you want to hear. Don't be afraid to ask questions and then take a few moments to give your input as well.
It is hard work being a good listener, and there are lots of people who never really listen. They hear what they want to hear, and you know that, because they might say something like ‘you are always talking about this thing or that thing’. But why do they not listen? Here are 10 tips for being a good listener. 1. Be careful what you ask Of course, if you want to know what someone thinks about something, ask. But before you do ask you should be sure you want to know. If you are interested in the answer, you will listen. This is because listening involves filtering through what is said. It is not like receiving information which you can take on board immediately. It is like listening to someone giving an account of an event that you were not present at.
Being a good listener, a clear mind, positive energy, respect, and motivation are all things that we must strive to implement in our lives to lead happy lives. The number one habit that keeps us stressed is not listening, which ultimately turns into listening with fear. If we could listen with concern, we would hear what the other person has to say. If we listened with concern, we would experience their feelings. If we listened with concern, we would understand the feelings. Imagine how much different we would be if we could all listen with concern. More Images Bypassing the stubborn part of the brain to open up an ideal listening channel is what good listening is all about. Now, we must translate the listener’s feelings into our own hearts.
