There are certain customs in a society which has changed its shape but are  still appealing to the "Men" folk of our country. If I so clearly mention" Men" here, I would be subjected to criticism, but without giving much stress to "Men" here, I think I should give the stress on the word "Society"...

 For thousands of years, our society has been following the system of 'Dowry' in different forms.It has taken different shapes and sizes after so many years.

In ancient time people use to follow blindly the need of strengthening  their daughter with some wealth before getting them married off. In those days people were more concerned about getting the daughters married. There was not much concern about getting the daughter involved in some work for living.

People knew that girls would get married and manage the homes of their husbands. The total thought process was of this type.

 I'm not saying anything against these thought process that existed in the ancient time. To total society was made in that way and people perceived in the heart that their daughters are very delicate souls and they needed some security, be it strength or wealth.

 For wealth the fathers would do whatever they could for providong a good " Dowry" to their daughters and the strengths would be completely provided by the husband or the son.

This was supposed to be the total structure of this society, then. But after those prehistoric time society have changed a lot. Today girls are working ,girls and learning self defense, girls are supporting their own family which is all quite 'okay 'but has the process of getting a daughter married changed much???????

 There lies my question .Today men and women are earning as well as taking care of their children, parents ,work ,household everything .This is done in a much balanced and organized way. Then why do a girl's father give a car ,some furniture ,jewelry to the daughter, when she gets married????

 Now here I am not putting a question to the 'Men" folk at all. I'm not qestioning anything to the society 'at all '.

My question is solely to the daughter,who is getting married off. Only to that daughter I ask this question . Why do the daughter go to such an agreement where her father has to invest some lacs or crores of rupees to get her married off?????

 Today  most of the ' Men'  do not ask for ' 'Dowry'.  I have my own own experiences too. They do not ask for furniture ,money ,TV , car,bungalow etc...

 They're only interested in the person they choose as partner and her identity.

 If the girls  are working and are eligible for marriage, then why should they take those huge number of things from her parents , whole leaving their home????

Does she not feel bad about a father,who has struggled so much for her education, her upbringing and her well being????
 

 My question is totally to the women who allowed their mothers or fathers to give them so much in the name of marriage .

I have not a single word to say against the 'Men'. Very few educated Men demands anything in the name of marriage.

 I respect  them for this but I cannot respect  the women ,who, so naturally wants their parents to give them so much in the name of marriage .

Shall we not feel defeated as a girl, as a lady or as a woman??????

 At the most a girl should call off a marriage which subtly demands a Dowry,  if not directly .

A girl should have that much respect for her own family and parents .Her parents have taken  the same pain  as the husband's parents have done.

 The girl is working equally like the husband .

Then  why should a girl want more things from her parents' savings just to make  her own 'home '???

This is a point which disturbs me often when I see matured, self established ,independent girls taking money, furniture, car, jewelry.... from their parents 'in the name of marriage'.......!!!!!!!!!