The subject of getting a possessive or dominant relationship partner could feel worlds off from the sweet sentiment behind asking somebody to be your Valentine. However, several couples realize there will be a slippery slope from needing a disciple to desirous to own them. once it involves addressing feelings of jealousy or insecurity, couples will cross the road from like to greed. They typically get into every other’s boundaries and disrespect every other’s inherent independence. think about all the key searches through cell phones, the guilt journeys once one partner goes out with friends, the outbursts once support isn’t offered, or the interrogations over attractions to anyone else.

There square measure several delicate and not-so-subtle ways that individuals arrange to management relationship partners as a way to calm their own emotions. Yet, feeling connected to somebody doesn’t mean it's okay to act entitled, or to exert power over them. In fact, makes an attempt to exercise power over our partners truly serve to scale back and diminish our own attraction to them. once we try and management somebody near to North American nation, we have a tendency to limit them in ways in which build them less themselves. we wish our partners (and ourselves for that matter) to be consummated, all-round people UN agency square measure totally alive. once we build our partner feel guilty for selecting to pay time with friends, as an example, we have a tendency to truly shrink their world. invariably|we must always} always aim to grow every other’s worlds instead of limit them. Otherwise, we have a tendency to take the air and life out of the link. It’s no surprise that studies have shown that jealousy and police investigation behaviors we regularly escort greed result in relationship discontentedness and damaging behavior.

So however are you able to stop the possessive patterns in your relationship? the primary step is to know why you interact in dominant behavior, and also the second step is to trot out the underlying feelings that drive you toward AN unequal dynamic.

Most people have a point of worry and insecurity encompassing our shut relationships. These feelings will spring from deeper struggles we've with trust, low vanity, fears of rejection, loss or intimacy itself. These ingrained emotions will result in a need to manage. rather than exploring wherever these feelings return from, we have a tendency to tend to project them onto our partner and begin acting out dominant behaviors that we have a tendency to hope can alleviate these painful feelings.

For example, we have a tendency to could on some core level feel hateful or like nobody would ever select North American nation. This negative self-concept will lead North American nation to act out all types of jealous or insecure behaviors with our partner. we have a tendency to could begin giving them the slight in hopes they’ll show interest in our feelings. we have a tendency to could act exploited and wounded by any comment or action that we are able to interpret as regardless or rejecting. we have a tendency to could outright scold our partner or build rules regarding wherever they will and can’t go, what they will and can’t do. All of those behavior patterns have heaps additional to try and do with North American nation than our partner. And most of them have deep roots in our past.